Leslie Bennetts, contributing editor to Vanity Fair and an author of a book urging women not to raise their own children, had an opinion piece published on Mother’s Day in the Los Angeles Times.


Have to seen low little attention Father’s Day gets in comparison?


I’d be angry too if magazines had told me I could “have it all” without any sacrifices, and I believed them, and then I found out that reality was different.


Some are angry because they expected someone else to take care of their every need and want, they expected their kids would be like pets, and they expected they would have the freedom to pursue – or not – the career of their choice, and when those expectations are not fulfilled, anger is the result.


I don’t think raising children insonly the mother’s responsibility.  But the burden is on women to choose a man who will be there for their children.  They can not simply have sex with any man they choose and will him into being a good father.  It isn’t going to happen.  Now, most women who marry do so to a man who earns more, and they expect him to provide her with a certain lifestyle.  He needs to work in order to do that, and that often means long hours away.  Money doesn’t grow on trees.


Employers hire people to do jobs.  They don’t hire them to give them a place to hang out while their kids are in school.  Raising children is a choice.  I recall that “feminists” are big on children being a choice.  If you choose to have children, raising them should be your concern – your employer should not be mandated to “care”.  If you are valuable enough as an employee, perhaps you can find an employer who will value your parenting of your children.  Such employers are often religious, though – which can be a problem for some people who call themselves “feminists”.


Again, women tend to marry men who earn more than they do, and those men often work more than full-time hours.  I tend to think a division of labor is a good idea, but if both the man and the woman are working full-time outside of the home, they should try to evenly split the housework.  However, I don’t think they should have children if they are both working so much.  And any woman who shacked up with the guy before they got married should know about his domestic habits and what he is likely to do.  It is stupid of her to marry him if she isn’t happy with the arrangements.


Then you’d support lowering taxes so that one income would be enough for most families?  When you consider the extra taxes, the costs of commuting, wardrobe, daycare, etc., how much does the second income really help?


Yes, men, who often work until they die and die younger than women and often lose access to their kids and half of everything they’ve worked for… they have no reason for resentment.


Uh, that’s what alimony, child support, and insurance are for.  Prenuptial agreements can help, too.  Women who stay home are more likely to avoid divorce if they have chosen their husband carefully, treat him well, and stay faithful.


I’d be angry, too, if my head was filled with the junk found in so many magazines, daytime television, and romance novels.


You write as though fathers don’t have to make choices.  Do you think most men are working in their dream jobs?  Some men a stuck in their jobs because they have a wife and kids to support and supply benefits to.  Even if the wife is in a career, how long is she likely to put up with a husband is leaves a steady job to chase a dream?  Some men have a dream job that means long hours, lots of travel, and/or networking in social environments – often things he has to give up for the sake of his marriage and fatherhood.  Too often men succumb to the pressure to get married before they’re ready, and end up stuck on what was supposed to be a stepping-stone.  There are other sacrifices men make to be fathers.


You are delusional if you think such women would a) not be prone to erupting into full-blown rage; and b) not attack each other - if this issue didn’t exist.  There's always something - even if it is really nothing.


That’s rich, coming from a woman who ambushed a prominent stay-at-home-mommy advocate  - Dr. Laura - with a hatchet piece.


Do you know why?  Because the earning gap is a lie, at least a lie when attributed to gender discrimination.  These stats usually take these groups as a whole, instead of matching them job to job, hour to hour, at the same employer.  For example, men are more likely to work risky jobs.  A woman working as a secretary is not going to earn the same amount as her boss.  A woman who comes into work late, leaves early, or doesn’t come in at all  - to take care of her kids is taking time away from work – notice that single mothers seem to earn the least.  If a job involves commission or pay raises can be negotiated, the person with more testosterone is likely to earn more.  Overall, a woman will make the same amount as a man in the same job, working the same hours, doing the same quality and amount of work.  If your statistics told the whole story, employers would only hire only single mothers because they could get the same work done for less money.  Should a single mother secretary who comes in late, and leaves early get the same paycheck as the manager who is in early and leaves late and works the occasional weekend?


I don’t know where you get that statistic, but let’s assume it is true.  Do you think it might have something to do with child custody?  I find this figure dubious, though.


Why can’t you work that out with your employer?  Why does someone else have to do it for you?


So you won’t accept gifts or cards?  You know, some husbands bust their butts to make Mother’s Day a special day, agonizing over arrangements and gifts when he’d rather spend the money on his car.  And what does he get?  Angry ranting from a woman who seems upset that women have a uterus and men don’t.

Kids need to be raised by their parents.  If you are so concerned about women and employment, then encourage women to let their husbands stay home and raise the kids.  Most women, though, find such an arrangement intolerable.  They prefer to be with their children, and they prefer to be married to a man who earns more than they do and can take care of them, and lose respect for him if he doesn’t, especially if he doesn’t work at all.