Posted by
Playful Walrus on Wednesday, February 18, 2009 10:05:24 AM
What will the Porkulous Bill will do to - er, uh - for you? The Associated Press ran this piece on the subject.
The recovery package has tax breaks for families that send a child to college, purchase a new car, buy a first home or make the ones they own more energy efficient.
Okay, well let's see. I bought a new car two years ago, am I just out of luck on that one? Oh, and I supposed you could have classified me as a first-time homebuyer (my wife wasn't) when we bought a few months ago – am I out of luck on that one, too? And did I install the new (energy efficient) HVAC system too soon? So, basically, if I had been a procrastinator I would be rewarded.
Millions of workers can expect to see about $13 extra in their weekly paychecks, starting around June, from a new $400 tax credit to be doled out through the rest of the year.
Big wow. In California, our new taxes will more than erase that.
The $1,000 child tax credit would be extended to more low-income families that don't make enough money to pay income taxes, and poor families with three or more children will get an expanded Earned Income Tax Credit.
So I waited until I was making enough money to have children, and I'm going to get rewarded by giving more of my money to people who have children before they can support them – via what amounts to a welfare check? Gee, thanks.
Then there's some explanation of how I'm going to be paying for the health insurance of more people I don't know, who never send me so much as a thank you. Then we move on to this...
About $300 million would go for rebates to get people to buy efficient appliances.
Oh, so now I'm getting punished for not procrastinating on buying the washer, dryer, and oven.
The stimulus sets up a $54 billion fund to help prevent or restore state budget cuts, of which $39 billion must go toward kindergarten through 12th grade and higher education.
What about the fact that our public schools are unusable for safety and curriculum reasons and we have to homeschool our kids or pay extra to send them to private schools? Now I'm going to get stuck paying even more to warehouse Mexico’s children. Gee, thanks.
The stimulus bill also includes more than $4 billion for the Head Start and Early Head Start early education programs and for child care programs.
Oh, good. So I get to pay more for day orphanages even though I have sacrificed so that my child has a parent taking care of her?
The maximum Pell Grant, which helps the lowest-income students attend college, would increase from $4,731 currently to $5,350 starting July 1 and $5,550 in 2010-2011. That would cover three-quarters of the average cost of a four-year college. An extra 800,000 students, or about 7 million, would now get Pell funding.
And what will the institutions do? Charge them more because they will have more. Universities can do the math. They have math professors.
The stimulus also increases the tuition tax credit to $2,500 and makes it 40 percent refundable, so families who don't earn enough to pay income tax could still get up to $1,000 in extra tuition help.
Ah, good. More welfare.
More than 37 million Americans live in poverty, and the vast majority of them are in line for extra help under the giant stimulus package.
Are talking about those people with big screen TVs, cell phones, and game consoles? The ones who are getting fatter and fatter?
People who get food stamps - 30 million and growing - will get more.
More welfare!
Oh, it is so lovely. Thanks, Obama. Thank you for making it more clear every day that I'm a fool for living within my means.